You know, when cell phones first started becoming popular but were still not something everyone had, people would rip on them and the people that owned them. I’m sure I was one of them ripping on people with cell phones and calling them names like Zack Morris or Doctor or stupid prick on his fucking cell phone. You know what I’m talking about right? See, I’m a people person as I’m sure you’ve gathered by now.
Well now I’ve got myself a cell phone, in fact I’ve had one for quite some time now. I like my cell so much I don’t even have a landline anymore. I guess I figured that as long as people annoy me, I might as well let them just annoy me wherever I go. There’s nothing more exciting than trying to take a shit and answering a phone call. Usually when that happens I try to tell them some elaborate lie so they will say something like “you’re full of shit” and then I can say… well not for long.
Anyway, on to the newest bunch of stupid shit that technology has brought us… the Bluetooth headset. I do not have one, and I do not plan on having one either. Unlike the cell phone, this is one piece of plastic that I can do without. I don’t even get on that high horse calling people losers and shit that are walking around talking to their tiny ear attached phone. I only have one problem with the Bluetooth headset… I can no longer tell who the assholes are from the crazy bastards. You see, before this craze came along, if I saw someone walking down the street talking to themselves, I knew this person was crazy and I should perhaps side step. Now I see someone walking along talking to themselves and waving their arms all around, I have to first check out their ears before I make such a bold assumption. Oh no, this guy isn’t a retard; he’s talking on his headset… so in actuality he is a retard.