Hey… It’s my birthday. Let’s all celebrate.
Ok, now that we got that shit out of the way, lets move onto more pressing matters. Saw something real disturbing on television today that completely shocked, amazed and made me stand up and take notice. No… nothing to do with CNN or the sniper today, I saw a commercial for Cottenelle bathroom tissue.
The commercial was showing people’s asses, and mentioning something about how you know you’ve cleaned or something. This is the first time that I remember in my life that a toilet paper commercial actually referred to someone’s ass! Imagine that, on my birthday even. I feel so happy.
Now on to the whole sniper thing. Hey, they caught those fuckers on my birthday too. Exactly when do I get a present here anyway? Did you see the Police/FBI press conference tonight? Looked like a Grammy Acceptance speech to me. I was waiting for them to thank J-Lo or some shit. Only thing that bothers me is the stupid duck in the noose comment they wanted them to make. Is there another one out there somewhere? A third man possibly? Wait until everyone feels safe and strike again? Well, guess I should take my hypothetical ass over to CNN, could probably get a job there.