Month: March 2003

I was watching the news today and what did I see? They are going to change the color of money. What the fuck for? Are we not totally confused as a nation already and now we are going to go changing the color of our currency. Did we run the fuck out of green ink all of the sudden? I just hope it isn’t some pussy ass pink color or something like that. You just can’t pay for a case of beer with pink money… it isn’t right!

I read that another prisoner who is serving a life term is up for an organ donation. What the fuck? These people don’t deserve this. Let’s see, we should save your life so that you can live off the state for another 30 years? No, fuck you… die bastard. I think it is time we stopped treating prisoners like everyday citizens. They’re in fucking prison. This is not summer camp, stop treating them like it.

Tuesday… yippee. Aside from the short day tomorrow, there isn’t much to be celebrating. I read that we caught some terrorist mastermind. I didn’t realize that a master of terror would look anything like a washed up porno actor. That picture is classic. What a disgrace to well groomed terrorist everywhere. Oh well, now onto the torture part. (Yeah, we do that, don’t let ’em bullshit you.)

I do wish that it would finally get a little warmer out. I think it’s about 12 today, that is just too damn cold. I can’t wait til I can write in here how damn hot out it is today, well it’ll be here faster than Pee Wee Herman to a daycare.

Caught a glimpse of that lame ass reality show tonight. I think it was Help, I’m a washed up celebrity, get me out of here. Well, something like that anyway. I was quite shocked, I didn’t see Corey Feldman or Corey Haim there. What the hell kind of lame ass stupid shit is this? When was the last time these people actually did something to even count as a celebrity. Downtown Julie Brown looks like some kind of recovering crack addict. Should be calling her Downhill Julie Brown from now on. Wubba Wubba that bitch. That Chris Judd is on there just because he fucked J-Lo. Like that makes him a celebrity, he was just at the front of the line. Joan Rivers daughter is on there, yikes…how can someone so damn ugly say anything bad about how other people dress? There is some guy on there that won some Olympic stuff back in the 70’s. Does that count to be a celebrity? Robin Leach was apparently on there, but was booted already, I think his voice probably pissed them all off. It would me anyway. I’m kicked off the Island, and I don’t know why.

Oh well, then you go outside here and its so damn cold the piss freezes before it even comes all the way out of the dog, he just walks around leaving little piss-sicles all over. Thank God it’s not my dog.

Another month gone. Hey, it was the short one anyway. Not much going on around here now. Mr. Rogers is dead, guess it’s not a beautiful day in the neighborhood today. Oh well, I didn’t watch his show anyway.

We’ve gone a week now without any mass deaths at a nightclub. Surprising isn’t it?

So when the hell is gas going to finally go down a little bit more? I’m about ready to say fine… go blow the shit outta Iraq just so I can get a break at the pump.

Read this somewhere: “The World Water Council said more intense rainy seasons, longer dry seasons, stronger storms, and rising sea levels had helped cause an increasing number of disastrous floods and droughts.” That is just shocking. I had no idea there was a World Water Council. I wonder how the hell you get in on that club. Maybe you have to know the Culligan man or something. I wonder if something like that would help getting you laid? Hey baby… World Water Council… that’s right, I’m a member, can I get you wet?

Ok, that would probably just get you slapped, but you can’t blame a guy for trying.