HATE LIST

First I’ll give you a little back story on this entry. I wrote this as a freshman in high school because in English class we were supposed to keep a journal and write something everyday. This isn’t a “people I want to kill” list or anything like the dumb little fuckers are doing these days in school. This was simply a list of things I hated, or at least wrote down that I hated so I could finish off another stupid journal entry. Oh, and Bo Jane & Toots were two dogs that we were stuck babysitting for about 8 months in case you’re wondering. Anyway, here it is, circa 1987 or 1988.

I am going to write down a whole list of things that I hate. Cigarettes, country music, tornadoes, school food, old cars (Studebakers especially), Bo Jane, Toots, pushy church people, door to door salesmen, nuclear missiles, boring study hall, F’s, mosquitoes, gnats, bumble bees, faith healers, crank calls, major diseases, drugs, big dogs, murderers and rapists. I hate when I break something and it’s a very valuable thing. I hate when someone makes fun of retarded people. I hate people who live off of welfare and don’t try to get a job and someone who needs money can’t have it. I hate when you get in trouble for something someone else did. I hate my gym teacher. I hate when you step in dog crap. I hate nosy people. I hate spinach. I hate my cat when he eats a whole bunch and then pukes it up. I hate plastic fruit. I hate finding hairs in my food. I hate when you puke and it goes through your nose. I hate going to a whole bunch of garage sales with my mom and grandma. I hate the stupid get-togethers on my birthday, Christmas and other major holidays.

Ahh, the wonderfulness of being a freshman in high school, you can almost feel the oncoming wedgie or swirlie. Of course since I was becoming a disgruntled human back then, you know that the hate list would have to continue, which it did towards the end of the year, at least at the end of writing journals. Enjoy.

This is my last entry for ninth grade I have to ever write. I think if Bo Jane comes back, I will kill her. I turned her mean, my job is accomplished. I have a few other things for my hate list. I hate Monday morning at first hour. I hate this study hall. I hate people that trip you in the hall. I hate pens that explode. I hate when you forget to get your homework done. I hate when I do bad on a test. I hate writing these stupid journals. I hate dogs named Spuds. I hate that seniors get out a week before me. I hate detention. I hate the school cafeteria. I hate having to come back to school after a nice long vacation. I hate people who get scared of movies like A Nightmare on Elm Street. I hate having to mow the lawn and bagging it all in one day. I hate the snow when it stays all the time. I have many more things that I hate. I can’t remember them right now, but the one thing that I like is this is my last stupid journal entry I have to write.