Category: Uncategorized

It’s Sunday, can you tell how happy I am? I get to go back to work tomorrow. I was watching TV last night around 3 or so in the morning. Why is there even television on at that time? I guess in that tired ass frame of mind I might actually consider ordering a Tony Little Gazelle, or one of those new sauce pans that you can pour the water out of, or anything that Billy Mays can pull out of his ass. Speaking of infomercials and Billy, what is up with him anyway? He’s way too excited to be on TV at 3 am. He makes everything sound way better than it is. This guy could take a shit in a box, make you think you needed it, and sell it to you… at 3 in the morning anyway.

It snowed again last night while I was watching my infomercials. You know, I wouldn’t mind if it would just snow and get it over with, but this little 1 inch at a time bullshit is really getting on my nerves. If it has to snow, just snow, let me get my big ass snowblower out and take care of it, I don’t want to shovel everytime the driveway gets frosted, and I don’t want to look like the retard out snowblowing with a John Deere for 1″ of snow either, I need to invent something to clean the driveway off with a lot less effort, where’s that fuckin Billy Mays when you need him?

Wish I didn’t have to go back to work yet. Those bastards didn’t need me back yet did they? Nahh. Work still sucks, even in the new year, not a whole lot of fun stuff going on here, watched xXx yesterday on my day off, that was cool, might take off next Wednesday also just cuz I can.

It’s 2003… Like you didn’t figure that shit out yourself. Resolutions for the new year. I will finish my page and not redo it 100 times a month. I will spend less time online and more time doing cool real stuff. I will watch more cool television shows. I will find a job that I actually like. I will pay off my car early… ok, now I’m running out of ideas.

It’s here, the end of 2002, and I don’t have a new calendar. Ain’t that a bitch. I’m not sure if you are aware of a very bad social problem out there that really pisses me off. Nah, not homelessness or something like that, but the fact that every December 31 of every year I can remember, at least 10 people have said “see ya next year”. They say it like its some clever shit they made up. Do they not realize that I have already heard that from every other schmuck without an intelligent thought today? Next time someone says “see ya next year” I’ll tell them to make it five, ’cause that’s how long my sentence is going to be when I beat the living shit out of them…. Happy Fuckin’ New Year!

Going back to work sure did suck, especially after that whole wanting to win the lottery thing and what not. Some fucker in West Virginia won. Not only did he take the cash option, but he is giving 10% to his church right off the bat. That’s 17 million. Damn. This wouldn’t be so bad aside from the fact that the person was a successful business man already and probably lived rather comfortably without these winnings. Oh well, I guess it’s about time West Virginia was known for something other than toothless inbreeding.

If you needed me to tell you that it is December 25th, then apparently Santa didn’t bring you the brain that everyone that knows you asked him to bring. Tonight is the night. Powerball is at 280 Million. Although I haven’t got a snowballs chance in Hell of winning, I have already planned out about half of the first years winnings. Houses, cars, boats… every relative that I didn’t even know existing calling me within 24 hours of going public. People begging for money at every street corner, people I can’t even stand claiming they were my friends. Every person with something to sell asking me to buy their product. All the news channels hounding me for an interview. Strange women claiming I was their baby’s daddy. Damn, that kinda sucks. But I would have 280 million, so fuck it.

It’s finally Christmas Eve! Thankfully, because I am getting really sick of the music and everything else going on with this holiday. I don’t mind Christmas songs, but unfortunately where I work, they play them nonstop all day long. That wouldn’t be bad, but it seems that there are about 4 songs that they play by every artist that has ever covered that song. I can only take about 39 versions of Rudolph before I snap. Between that and dreaming of a white Christmas, I can’t wait until Thursday so we can get back to normal music again. Then comes stupid Valentines day. Yippee.

Old man came into the store today. He was looking for a cough medicine, which I showed him. Then I went to get him a cheaper generic off one of the endcaps and when I came back it smelled like someone had died. I tried to not notice and he goes ‘you ever had hemorrhoid surgery?’ to which I said no. Then he decides to tell me that he did, and ever since he did he keeps letting “little stinkers”, and his wife gets so mad at him. Little stinkers? The fucking fluorescent lights were popping, there was nothing little about it, I thought we had been sprayed with Mustard Gas or something, it was horrible. Then he keeps talking to me… it’s like, let me get the fuck out of the smelly area and go get some fresh air. I had stomach problems already, I surely didn’t want to throw up all over my aisle. Damn people.

You can tell Christmas is in the air can’t you? Know how? Every year around this time something really special happens. They run ads for The Clapper and for Chia Pets. You hardly would know that these goofy ass products even exist until this time of year, then BAM, there they are on your television for you to see and buy. And where do you buy these wonderful items at? Why Kmart of course. Who in the hell else would advertise this leftover from 1987 shit besides them?

Friday the 13th…..Oooh. I think we have moved from the killer stuff happening on this day to the point where people just do so many stupid things that your head is about to explode or something. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, people just plain ‘ol piss me off. I have started to download stuff off of Kaaza now, at least on a trial basis to see if I like it any better than winmx or not. Thankfully I have two days of rest now, of course I need to get my ass shopping though!

Thankfully I got my car back. Looks brand new again. Not only did I get the fender fixed, but I got some of the minor scratches taken out and the whole car buffed to a pretty damn nice shine. I don’t seem to remember it being that bright when I took it into the shop.

I just realized that Christmas is rapidly approaching. I suppose I better get my ass in gear and buy some stuff. I found two different newsboards about the company I work for, one on LYCO’s and the other on YAHOO. Neither paint a real pretty picture of the corporate office or how they do business. Oh well, nothing I didn’t know of in the first place.