Author: David

This is my favorite time to watch the news and weather. Why you may ask? Because there is a fucking hurricane out there and every news agency is going to pick one of their low ranked “reporters” and stick their poor asses right in the middle of it. Nothing makes me smile more than seeing a grown up standing outside in pelting rain with their ugly yellow raincoat flapping in the wind trying to talk and not fall down. Who needs comedy when you have this shit? I can’t think of a more demeaning job as a reporter than having to do something like that. You might as well be interviewing circus freaks or something. At least you would stay dry that way, unless one threw up on you.

Today was my short day thankfully. I needed to get out of there early anyway. I got my eye exam today, and ordered up some new specs, so hopefully they will be in by this time next week for me. My contacts seemed fine and the strength is so close to the new prescription that I can just keep wearing these until I totally destroy them. Let’s hope they make it another year.

Made a few changes on the site. I added templates before, but now I’ve got a specific template just for the blogs and I’ve got a slightly new look on the front page. I felt it was looking too much like the blog page so I wanted to differentiate a little bit. The Stewie Link will probably change as I find new and cooler stuff to put up.

What the hell happened? Wasn’t it just Friday afternoon? Now suddenly it is Sunday night and I have to go to work tomorrow. Even my short day is somewhat spent because I’m going to the eye doctor that afternoon. Yep, new specs for my ass; well, actually for my eyes. That might not look good if I wore my glasses on my ass. I think if I would stop doing all kinds of things on the weekend then maybe it wouldn’t go by so fast. What I need to do is get one of those jobs where you only work one or two days a week. What is that called again; welfare?

I started working on a new site for a friend. I have it temporarily up on a subdomain here, but I won’t put up the link because it won’t be here too long I’m sure. It only took an hour to do, but I already redid it again tonight. I guess I am my worst critic. Damn me anyway.

I read a very disturbing headline today: Yoko Ono to go naked for peace. Well, the only good thing about that is she is going to do it in Paris and nowhere near the United States. You know, I have two problems with this. Number one, she’s 70 years old. I don’t even want to see Madonna naked anymore, so how in the hell is some 70 year old wrinkled cooch going to make me think about peace? The only peace I’ll be thinking about is that piece of pizza that just hurdled out of my stomach and is now on the floor with various other stomach remnants. The mass stampede to the doors will not be peaceful, in fact it might get down right ugly. That brings me to problem number two. It’s Yoko Ono. Dear, no one wants to see you naked anymore, OK? Can’t you just sing a song… oh wait, that might be even more painful.

If you want a tribute to two years ago, you’re in the wrong place. I was in no way personally affected by the attacks and therefore unlike anyone who was, stand to make nothing off peddling my story to the press for money and cheap tears. So… nothing like that here. You can turn on any channel and watch that drivel today. Myself, I would rather watch my Family Guy DVD’s and at least laugh my ass off.

I now own all three seasons of The Family Guy. Between this show and South Park, I may never stop laughing. I just found out tonight that there is talks of doing a Family Guy Movie that would come out directly on DVD, which would be sweet. I have no idea if that would spell further TV adventures or not, but I wouldn’t doubt it. Apparently the high amount of DVD sales they’ve experienced and the high ratings that Cartoon Network is getting on the reruns has resparked some interest in this show. I saw it a few times back in the days when it was on FOX, but they moved the damn thing around so much, I just lost interest in trying to find the damn thing on TV. Now I don’t have to with the DVDs. Hey, if you like Family Guy, and think the Governer’s Race in California is a joke, then go vote Stewie for Governor.

Holy shit, I set up Halloween yesterday. I think I have less stuff this year than I ever have before. Why, because I felt like ordering less stuff I guess. When you see your shit sit there and lose your ass taking markdowns on it, you start to think that maybe you shouldn’t even carry it in the first place.

Another week started. Tomorrow it is time to set up Halloween. I just love to set that up so everyone can whine that it is too early for Halloween. What am I supposed to do, not put it out until October? It’s bad enough that our store carries the same exact shit every year and no one buys it, now I shouldn’t put it out. We still carry the Scream masks and run them on ad. How long has that movie been out? Six or seven years, and here we are selling them and advertising them like it’s the newest thing to hit the store. I’m surprised we don’t still have the hockey mask, which this year might actually do something, but nope, not until next year when it’s out of style again. We also do the same lame ass kids costumes every year. Who the fuck dresses up like a pirate anymore? Kids want to be Spongebob, or Dora the Explorer, not some lame ass generic character from the 1960’s.

Hey, the tips section is finally up. It’s full of wonderful practical advice you may need in your life. I am still working on more to fill up the page, as I only have five different categories up now. I’m still not sure if I want to add anymore sections to the page or not. I think in the future I may, depending on what I can think of. The whole tips thing really only took me about 8 hours total to crank out, which isn’t too bad. Unfortunately the 8 hours spanned a few weeks of time.

Guess I haven’t been here since I updated the page. It’s like I always say, these four-day weeks are longer than the five-day weeks. You spend the first few days back trying to play catch up from the day off you had. Luckily I don’t care anymore, so therefore it isn’t quite as hard for me to go back to work.

I am helping my other friends move this weekend. I think I’m going to get the itch to move myself pretty soon. Any suggestions? My back was finally starting to feel good from my Noah’s Ark accident, so I guess it probably was time to put some stress on it again. Besides, summer is over, what do I need my back for in the winter? Like I want to shovel snow. Fuck that.

My tips section is still in the process of being put up. I found my thinking time now. 5am. That sucks if you ask me, but I woke up this morning and probably wrote more shit than I have altogether yet. Apparently being on this diet makes me think clearer in the morning, and has seemingly turned me into a morning person…AHHHHHHHH!! Oh well, feel better anyway. Speaking of which, I am currently down 91 pounds as of this morning, so I guess I can handle mornings on that. Well, that’s it for the tips, as far as the tricks & bitches, I’ll have to wait for Snoop to get here.

Ahh, there’s nothing I like more than driving to work and seeing all the children on their way to school. Makes me feel good to know the little shits will be preoccupied for nine months or so, and hopefully keeping out of trouble. It gives me a warm tingly feeling watching the little bastards walking to school with that nasty sneer on their face wondering where the hell the summer has went. Unfortunately, that’s a feeling that I also share with them. Where the fuck did summer go? I could have sworn it was just Memorial Day a couple of weeks ago. Did I pull a Rip Van Winkle and sleep through the season? That sucks ass if you ask me. The problem is that we are only about two months away from our first snowfall. Yep, that’s a problem.

I am working on this new design for my site, the whole white background and all. White on black isn’t as easy on the eyes as black on white for some reason. Maybe in the future I will start fucking with background designs and whatnot, but for now I like this. The new content isn’t uploaded yet, but the design is there and hopefully by the end of the week I’ll have the new stuff up completely. As of writing this, the new stuff that is up is a listing of the movies, music and games that I have and use, just to give you an idea of what I do when I’m not here. I also have my pictures up from St. Louis on the pics page. The entire tips section of the page isn’t up yet, so hopefully in the near future that will be up.

Another week is done. It was the pain in the ass week to, the return to work after a week of vacation. Luckily my first weekend back is a three day one. Thank you Labor Day. Last year at this time I was in a camper in Southern Wisconsin waiting to get pelted by hailstones. Ah, the memories. Not this year; can’t afford it this year with the fucking gas prices going through the roof. I would have gone on vacation, but unfortunately the loan didn’t go through. Thank God I don’t own an SUV, or I’d really be fucked.

What is the big deal about Mars? It’s another planet and we can see it. Whoopty fucking do. I saw it, it was orangish-red and it was pretty fucking small. Can I go back to bed now? If you’re into that kind of thing then have your little Mars party, but does it really deserve to be a big news story? Is the guy down at the planetarium boning Katie Couric or something? When I turn on CNN, I have come to expect to see death and destruction, not some science nerd explaining how close a planet is to us. When the fucking martians land, then you can let me know.

What a disappointment that was. Going back to work sure does suck after taking a week off. Luckily it was Monday so it was supposed to suck anyway. This was probably the best my department was when I came back from vacation. Normally when I go away for the week, it ends up so fucked up it takes at least a week to get it back in order. This time it was only partially fucked up, and I was able to fix everything today. I am just looking forward to Wednesday so I can get the hell out of there early.

I bought The Family Guy seasons 1 & 2 on DVD Friday. I think I spent the better part of Saturday watching all the episodes. Damn that is a funny ass show. I still love South Park, but this show is great. Too bad it didn’t last longer. I see season 3 (the final one) is coming out on September 9th, so I know I’ll be buying that when it comes out.

I saw on the news that a priest was killed in prison. The first thing I thought of was a priest was giving the last rights to someone and he got killed, until I saw the full story. Now that I know the entire story I have a question. What’s the big fucking deal? This priest was a convicted child molester that molested close to 150 boys in his 30 years as a priest. Although the guy that killed him is a few beers short of a six-pack, I applaud him. This shouldn’t be a topic on news shows everywhere except to say… Look at the dead fucking priest. I think they should start throwing all these child abusers into cells with psycho maniacs. Maybe that would become a deterrent instead of the pussy ass justice system that continually fucks itself with all this lawyer bullshit. Better watch out, I might get sued.

Well, I’m back. Not bad timing for leaving at 5 am on Saturday and getting back before noon on Wednesday. Not to mention we went all the way to Arkansas, then to St. Louis Missouri, Springfield Illinois, and Wisconsin Dells all in five days. On the way down, the gas gauge malfunctioned and we wound up running out of gas 5 miles south of Perryville, MO. That was adventure number one. I would like to thank the guy from the pest control service that was nice enough to pick us up and take us to the nearest gas station when he saw us walking down the highway, it was close to or over 90 degrees at the time. We still made it to Arkansas before 7 pm, so it was only a 14 hour trip. Arkansas wasn’t anymore than I expected, and there really wasn’t much to do there. I did go see American Wedding while there, sadly the highlight of that part of the trip.

We decided to leave Arkansas Monday morning instead of Tuesday, mostly because it was a little boring. On the way back through Missouri we had just passed Sikeston when we heard on the radio that U.S. 61 was shut down and DO NOT come down this way, apparently some guy had just robbed a bank and had a bomb in the Arby’s Parking Lot or some shit. We got to St. Louis somewhere around noonish and went and checked out the Arch. That thing is huge. We planned on riding the tram to the top to see it, but the next one was going up around 4 pm, and we wanted to get the hell out of there before then, because about a block away Monday Night Football was about to happen, and we didn’t want to stick around too long for that big ass traffic mess. We left St. Louis around 3:30 and headed north again, getting up to Springfield, Ill. We got to Springfield and checked into a Super 8, then set out in search of food. We ended up at Hooters!! Great place to eat, and the scenery is excellent.

We got up Tuesday morning and headed for Wisconsin Dells. It was supposed to storm all day today, so we decided that Tuesday would be the day to go do Noah’s Ark. We got into the park around 2 and had fun up until we crashed on the Black Thunder ride. We were riding double in a tube and when we got to the bottom, I went down and Mike went over top of me snapping my head forward and putting me into a world of hurt. My back still hurts but seems a lot better today compared to yesterday. That pretty much sums up my last five days. I am still off of work until this coming Monday, so I will try to thoroughly enjoy that. Now I need to go to bed and relax from all the stress of vacation.

Today is the one year anniversary of my blog. I started this the day I got back from Rapid City, South Dakota. It was supposed to be a nice little way to communicate my thoughts, however in about a weeks time from inception, it became my venting tool, and a way to share my warped point of view with the Internet world.

So how about that blackout on the East Coast. I noticed how they kept praising Bloomberg for how well he handled the situation. You know Giuliani was sitting somewhere going… Hey, remember the Trade Center? City in chaos ring a bell??? I am just waiting for Alan Jackson to try to make a buck off this whole deal. I can already hear the “Where were you, when the power went out” song on country stations everywhere.

As I said, today is the one year anniversary of this blog, and also when I got back from vacation last year. This year it is the day I’m going on vacation. Although not posting daily on here is common nowadays, I will actually have a reason this time. I’m going on vacation dammit.

Only a couple more days to go, then I’m free for a week. In case you haven’t noticed, I’m excited about not working for a whole week. I am so sick of damn near everything at work that I think I need this week off just to regain my thoughts. Between the corporate stupidity and the customer stupidity I am losing my mind.

I see there is a new worm on the Internet. The Blaster worm as it’s been called. I didn’t seem to get infected, although I seem to know a few people who did. This one was a little different, since it didn’t slip in through an e-mail, but instead it sneaks in through an open port. This is new, at least to me. Well, it’s basically a Trojan that instead of sneaking onto your system found an open door. Luckily I downloaded the patch a month ago when it showed up, otherwise I might be somewhat fucked.

I was thinking about going to California and running for governor since I was off next week, but I think I’ll pass this time. I don’t know if I could compete with the stripper, the Terminator and that little black boy from Different Strokes. Whatchu talkin’ bout Willis? That kid. Actually there are going to be 153 people to choose from. I guess California just wants to show Florida how to really fuck up an election.

Another weekend almost over. I can’t seem to think of a worse feeling than Sunday night, knowing you have to go back to the bullshit of work tomorrow. Well, one. The last day of summer vacation when you were in school. That always sucked ass big time. I don’t think there was one year that I didn’t dread going back, at least until after my senior year, and I couldn’t go back. It got a little weird. You do actually miss it. Getting a job sucks ass big time and if I could go back to school days again I would. So I guess I changed my mind. Going back to work on a Monday is way worse than going back to school after summer vacation. Fuck you, it’s my blog.

Just got home from camping, I guess I’m out of tune. I don’t think I’ve went since last Labor Day during the big ass storm. Well, of course it stormed again today. Luckily it was this afternoon, long after I was awake. The good news is that I only have this week to go, then I am out of work for a whole week! Yeah, vacation. Can you tell I can’t wait? I’m going to Arkansas, although I’m not sure why. Supposed to go up into the Ozark Mountains while I’m there, so if I do, I’ll take a few pictures and put them up on the site.